Thursday, March 08, 2007

Estee Musgrove & Piper
our travel group, all the babies are within one month of age of each other, all from Xiu Shan
group of middle aged people playing hackey sack type game in the park
woman taking dance lessons by the Pearl River

It's 3:30 am CA time, 5:30 am CST, but my body is still on China time 7:30 pm. Scott and Piper are asleep again after a 2 hour middle of the night party. Piper was hungry then very smiley and wired so we played for a while and tried to wear her out. When that didn't work, we got out the Benadryl strips. We only gave her a quarter of one, but it seems to be helping her sleep, besides she did sneeze twice while we were playing with her, so it was needed medically as well, don't you think?

Scott and I are both feeling a little weird, or I should say weirder than normal. Our middle of the night wake up call gave us time to talk through this amazing experience and sort out some of what we are feeling at this point. I've tried to give you an idea what our time in China was like, but in reality, there's just no explaining it adequately. It was an adventure of a lifetime in which we fell completely in love with little Piper Grace. I went there not knowing what to expect thinking I'd be counting down the days to go home. I knew I would love Piper, but I was totally unprepared for the depth and completeness of that love from the very beginning. I was unprepared for how different China would be, but I actually liked many of the differences rather than being turned off by them. At the same time, we are ready to go home. We miss Hunter and Ella so much and really need to see them. We were ready to leave China, but surprised by our feelings of loss from leaving there. China is such a part of our time with Piper Grace so far and we feel sad for the losses she has endured. Now that we know her and love her so fiercely, it is unimaginable to us that she almost spent her life in an orphanage and that she will have to face some very difficult questions some day. One thing we know for sure, God has a very special plan for her and will walk her through those things when the time is right. We will be right beside her and are glad that we got a taste of the country in which she was born. The whole experience is unique because of all it involves and because you do not do it alone. We thoroughly enjoyed getting to know some great people who were there for such a life changing time in our lives. Such a mix of strong emotions coupled with knowing that we get to see Hunter and Ella tomorrow and bring Piper home.
I learned a lot about myself on this trip that I am just beginning to sort through as well. I just never dreamed this experience would impact me so fully. One thing that keeps going through my mind is what if we would have given up on this long and twisty process? (tears rolling now)
I can't even conceive of missing this, of missing Piper, of not experiencing this blessing. It makes me wonder what other blessings I have missed because I have let my fear of the unknown keep me from following the road where Christ is walking. I don't want to miss another one that's for sure.
I could go on and on, it is 4:00 in the morning here after all and there's not a lot to do. No sleep in sight for me. Boy am I going to crash at some point! Blogger is not letting me post pictures right now, but I'll try again later.

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